Back to Work

Wow - has it really been 10 weeks since Lauren was born already? Pretty much. It's crazy, but in the first couple of weeks, and even sometimes during the last few weeks, I've been eagerly awaiting the day that I would go back to work. Not for the sake of going back to work and getting back to selling space on Evergreen vessels. Just for the camaraderie of the office and being with adults again. I love Lauren to death and I know I'm going to miss her terribly while I'm at work - I'll be lucky if I can even concentrate on work I'll be thinking about her so much, but there's really only so much one person can do with an infant day in and day out. Stay at home moms are tremendous people - I don't know how they do it. Maybe you just have to be wired that way to effortlessly take care of a child all alone for hours on end.

I know that going to daycare is going to be better for Lauren than staying with me all day every day. She'll have other kids to interact with and adults who are trained in working with infants to give them developmentally appropriate activities throughout the day to stimulate them. I think I've done a pretty good job so far, but it is exhausting both physically and mentally and there is always the worry that I could be doing more. Really, it's like teaching my classes again, but on a much more personal level where my failures affect my own child, and that's terrifying to me.

What wasn't terrifying to me was this weekend. My parents came down early on Friday so that I could go out to participate in Hema's Mehndi prior to her and Anuj's wedding on Sunday. The last time I had henna applied to my hand was in Morocco when I paid to have it done, with no particular event to accompany it other than my presence in Morocco. This time I found it to be very special because I was helping a friend celebrate her upcoming wedding to a guy that I think is a great friend in his own right and will be a wonderful husband to her. High maintenance, perhaps, but they will be happy together. I was one of three non-Indians there, which made me appreciate the evening even more because all of Hema's friends and family really welcomed us into the event, when they could have just left us on our own. There's nothing quite like sitting in a small room on a blanket-covered floor with Indian music blaring while everyone trades tales and greetings in mixtures of English and Hindi.

The wedding day was a piece of work, that's for sure. It started at 7:45 in the morning for me as Billy and I had to go to Hema's house so that her aunt could help get me dressed in one of Hema's saris. Tuhina had lent me some of her wedding-appropriate clothing, but Hema was really eager for us to wear sarees and eagerly insisted that we see if any of her stuff would fit. I look like I should be going to a Tennessee football game...except that the saree would never fit in at a football game. We got dressed and drove to the venue where we met up with Anuj's brother and sister-in-law who were leading Anuj's baraat. Alcohol would have made it easier to let loose and really dance it out in the middle of the street, but Indian pop music once again makes dancing easier. I wish I could have seen the looks on people's faces when they drove by our group dancing and cheering in the middle of the street in downtown Atlanta on a rainy Sunday morning, but I was too busy trying to not tear off my saree that I didn't really see what was going on around us.

The rest of the wedding ceremony went much as Tuhina and Karl's did, which was nice because I actually had a clue about what was going on thanks to my previous experience. Pumping breastmilk in a public bathroom in a borrowed saree was something I would have never thought I would have to do, but I can now say that it can be done, if not easily.

The couple left the wedding venue at 2:00 (keep in mind everything started at 9:00 am), and Billy and I went home to change for the reception (well, I changed clothes - Billy stayed in the outfit Anuj lent him). At the reception (which started at 6:00), Billy gave the greeting to the guests in Gujarati (I will probably never forget those four lines for the rest of my life, I heard them practiced so much), and then we sat through three hours of introductions, speeches, roasts and skits - complete with Bollywood musical numbers. The skit was actually really amazing as were the dances. Unfortunately, at 9:00, the food just beginning to be served and Billy had to be at work early this morning, so we had to leave before eating (just like we did for Tuhina and Karl's wedding). One day, I'll actually get to eat great Indian food at an Indian wedding. I'll just have to find more Indian friends first.

7 Week Update

Wow. I can't believe that we just hit the 7-week mark today. And to think that 7 weeks ago, I was crying because I couldn't possibly conceive of taking care of an infant. Today, I tote her around everywhere I go and for the past week or so, I've actually not been dreading full days with her. In the beginning, Lauren was so...asleep. When she was awake, she still couldn't really do anything because she was barely able to -see- anything. Her world awareness was eat, stay awake - sort of - and hurry up back to sleep for another hour or so before starting all over again.

Last week, all that changed and she continues to change through this week. Week 6 is supposed to be the most difficult in regards to fussiness, but she still didn't really fuss at all. In fact, she began to fuss less...she took better naps without crying beforehand and was more aware during the daytime hours. She has begun to interact more with her toys and with people around her, so I've been trying to get her out of the house and in public as much as possible - even a trip to the tire store to get tires on the Avalon replaced was great fun.

Today we went to the Alpharetta Greenway (which is quite nice) and had a nice lunch al fresco - she from a bottle, me from Chik-fil-A. When we got home, she had a nice nap and spent pretty much the rest of the day laughing and smiling and having a good time as we took a walk around the block. She is definitely fussier at night - I changed her schedule a little tonight (instead of a snack at 7, I fed her at 8 and changed her into PJs - not her Miracle Blanket). She's been sleeping through till 4:00 if she eats at 9, so I'm trying to see if she'll do the same if she eats at 8ish. Normally, she doesn't cry at all going to bed at 9:00 or 9:30, but tonight, she has been wailing since 8:40. I never thought I would be able to let a child of mine "cry it out" but I've been trying Dr. Weissbluth's sleep training methods (already at 6 weeks) and she's actually cried very little overall and sleeps pretty much through the night already.

Granted, she is drooling like a fiend which means that we might be expecting teeth in the next couple of months. That is also evident in the fact that in the past couple of days, Lauren's been treating my breasts like a chew toy which is far from pleasant...and all that right after she and I finally had the nursing thing down to a painfree experience. Oh well - the sacrifices we make for our kids. She'll know what I went through one day, but she'll still tell me she hates me one day in the future.

In the meantime, I'll take all the smiles and new lessons (like rolling over from her stomach to her back) and store them up as tight as possible. Perhaps it's time to write her a 7-week update as well...